It’s that time of the year again…

Playoff beards, parties, and a very high blood pressure.

Well, I can’t grow a beard so I guess that’s out.

Wisconsin could give two shits about hockey so finding friends to celebrate this special time with has very slim pickings (By slim I mean none).

But hey, I have a blood pressure that will increase no matter what state you live in. At least I have one thing I can always count on: A heart attack.

It’s the one time of the year when I actually want to listen to “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.” With a few select word changes of course, maybe a little something like:

It’s the most wonderful time of the year
With the head coaches yelling
And everyone telling teams “Bring Lord Stanley home”
It’s the most wonderful time of the year
It’s the hap-happiest season of all
With those bloody fist fights and hard hitting checks
When history is made
It’s the hap- happiest season of all

There’ll be parties for hosting
A Cup that needs hoisting
And smashing old records
There’ll be scary close moments
And tales of the glories of
the Greats from long, long ago

It’s the most wonderful time of the year
There’ll be a lot of goal scoring
And crowds will be cheering
Until one team is left
It’s the most wonderful time of the year

Or something along those lines any way….

Hey that song wasn’t very good. You know what, shut the hell up and make your own up then! Gosh give me a break. I never said I was an award winning song writer. I’m just a hockey fan damn it! I didn’t think your voice was “very good” so there! Yeah, I know you were trying to sing it along with tune to see if it fit.

I don’t know what’s so great about packed malls, spending hours looking for a parking spot, or fighting someone for that last “must have” gift left on the shelf, and someone’s grandma is always getting run over by a reindeer. It’s just a mess. Christmas is overrated.

But The Stanley Cup Playoffs… now THAT is something worth writing songs about. To say I’m a huge fan of the Pittsburgh Penguins is a gargantuan (because big wasn’t big enough) understatement.

How’s little Cindy Crysby doing with that broken jaw? Really, like I haven’t heard that one before. Let’s try being a little more original here people. You’re probably a Flyers fan, so I gotta ask how are the playoffs for you? NON-EXISTANT

Sidney-Crosby2

Ah the shit-talking. Every fan does it. It just makes the game that much more fun. It makes the rivalries just that much more interesting. It also makes the fan of the team that ends up losing look like a complete idiot and is left to deal with the ridicule that follows. But the love and loyalty for your team still carries on. The time to be redeemed is put off until the next season starts all over again with new players, new teams, and more shit -talking.

Something I noticed today when I was walking to class (in my Penguins jersey of course): During playoffs if you see anyone wearing a hockey shirt that isn’t your team, you hate their stinking guts! You just give them an evil stare and contemplate maybe checking them into a brick wall or nearby tree. But, if you see them during the off season or even just regular season, you give each other like a little head nod that simply says “oh hey, you like hockey too, that’s cool.”

I only kid. I’ll dislike other teams and even players. But I am always happy to meet another hockey fan.

The Playoffs will be for a while, so I’m sure I’ll have more to say but there’s a game to watch people!!

Let’s go PENS!!!

-TCBL

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